Elysium gives an excellent explanation ~ thank You. I have so much to learn. Jen, I know that these voices inside must be most confusing and debilitating and you must yearn to be your old self, but I have faith in a good therapist. Please don'tdo away with yourself! If these thoughts persist, go to the ER. You can find health in dealing with all the problems the alters/voices have created and eventually feel better. You can't don't that after death. So, Please, don't give in to that. We don't know what lies beyond, so we can't wish to die. I understand your wish to leave your burdensome circumstances, and I think they will be un-troublesome or tolerable, as you work in treatment. There are so many here like you who have become our most trusted, supportive and gifted members. In all sincerely and Hoping for your safety ~ billieJ