Quote:
Originally Posted by SophiaG
I dated a guy who had Aspergers for a while.
During the time I dated him (which wasnt too terribly long) I learned several things:
1) He had been sexually abused
2.) He was suicidal
3.) he claimed to be a sex addict
4.) He completely and utterly disregarded ALL my feelings
5.)He had Aspergers
During the Course of this relationship he:
1.) Overdosed twice
2.) cut himself several times even when I was RIGHT there with him
3.) made fun of my physical disablity (which was why I broke up with him)
4.)Cheated on me
5.) Didnt want me to talk to anyone but him
Another person who I've met recently claims to have Aspergers and they:
1.) are a compulsive liar
2.) disregard my feelings
Needless to say I didnt stick around to find out more.
is this normal behavior for an Aspie? Right now I dont particularly like them much.
And I cant believe I put up with that much from that one guy xD
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Let me provide you with a different point of view. I am somebody with Asperger's. Many of my friends and family believe I do the things you have checked off.
1) Pathological liar: I probably am a pathological liar. But I don't mean to be, it's hard to explain... It's like. I have to pretend to be somebody else just to get by. Especially in relationships. Most people HAVE social skills, while... I (and I think others with AS probably as well) have to learn them scientifically. I can fit in with any group of people. But not as myself. So while at parties, and social gatherings people tend to think I am awesome, and the life of the party... The people closer to me tend to see the inconsistencies, and they take it as a personal lie AGAINST them. However, it's just me trying to fit in.
2) Sex abuse: My opinion, is that him cheating on you being a sex addict is more related to him being abused. Not Aspergers.
3) Feelings: I can't say for them, but I can speak for myself when I say that I do not intentionally disregard people's feelings. I interpret things differently. A lot of times, to me, it seems as if my friends are disregarding my feelings as well. So naturally, the things I do, that I think are considerate, and thoughtful, aren't seen as such. Over time people have learned that this is my way of caring for them.
4) Possesion: This is something that I have a really hard time with. I know it's not right, but I do sometimes get offended when my girlfriends, or friends go do things with other people. My gut tells me that they are going to abandon me. That they like this other person better than myself. This usually ends up causing more issues than anything else... the problem is. People with AS tend to not have many TRUE friends. So when they get somebody that they can be themselves around... it's rare, and I for one, tend to latch on a little more than I should.