@ Lynn09, I agree with what you say... and i have been acting exactly how you describe i should... I thought to myself that i should be a friend to her but only on her terms and i think her and i have some differences i mean she walks with a different crowd... my family is very conservative... It's just that you know it feels good when someone says 'Hi dude how are you, what stuff's been going on'... i wish someone would call me and say those things... someone who really liked my company liked the person i am and not just cos they were bored and had nothing to look forward to... I have been keeping it together guess i'm so used to being alone that it doesnt have the same sting anymore... though i gotta tell ya that when it does sting the pain is overwhelming... i feel like a stupid whiner, i'm gonna help you out whenever you come across some trouble too... this is starting to feel selfish now... this is my third post on this thread and i havent helped you out with anything... Really, just these few replies i got seem overwhelming cos i realize the trash you guys go through each day to make a living and then you still find time to reply to all these self centered msgs... really makes you wonder that life aint all messed up as it appears to be... i owe you one, really!