(((((TreeHouse))))
I wish I had your T!
When I was on the verge of going into the hospital in the spring.... my last T said that she didn't know if she would be able to see me afterwards, because she may not have room in her schedule.
And, sure enough, when I got out of treatment in July, she refused to see me and referred me to my current T.
Spotted Owl said:
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ktgirl, this is a response to Dr. Muffin. Please do not take anything I say as a comment on your own T. Your own T responded very well to what you told her, and I think you are teaching her a lot by being so brave.
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Thank you, Spotted Owl.
I think your perspective is very well thought-out and makes a lot of sense. I like what you explained here:
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Now, lets assume the client does not have healthy coping mechanisms when they feel stuck, they look to the therapist to provide healthy modeling. If the therapist starts to hint about termination, what sort of a message are they sending to their client? What lessons are they teaching them about how to respond when they feel stuck? What lesson are they sending to the client about trust? All of these questions, and more *should* be given due deliberation before a therapist even thinks about bringing it up with the client directly
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It makes me think that maybe my T did make a big mistake by bringing up termination prematurely. When we spoke about the situation she asked me how she could have phrase it differently. I think any way which doesn't include the word "termination" would be good.
It certainly has affected our relationship. Although I am glad I brought it up with her I don't think I trust her as much. I'm not being honest with her anymore about my ED behaviors. And I don't feel guilty about lying to her, either. So, if I'm not being honest anymore, can anything more really be accomplished in this therapeutic relationship?
((((((BlueMoon)))))
wow - reading about your experience with dt was eye-opening for me, especially these parts:
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Originally Posted by BlueMoon6
I was almost always suicidal and SIing, and my ED was out of control. So, where was the healing with someone who wanted her way or the highway? I dont doubt that she wanted to work with me. HER WAY. And she wanted me to heal, HER WAY.
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This was how I felt with my last T, as well. And she always said that if I didn't try harder I would need a higher level of care, and she wouldn't be able to work with me anymore. Looking back, I felt threatened then too.
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Originally Posted by BlueMoon6
Her treatment approach was to tell me what to do....and question me in the following session...did I do this or that with food, if I didnt, why am I complaining? There was no discussion of how it feels to be stuck or what might be in the way of me stopping hurting myself with food. Do this, do that, if not, what could you have to discuss?
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This is how I feel with my current T. She is mainly CBT, and we don't discuss how I feel about things, although she does help me on re-structure thoughts.
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Originally Posted by BlueMoon6
It is very possible that I was re-traumatized in therapy with her, I dont like to think of it that way b/c it just sounds too dramatic. But, the truth is, I am working on the horrible feelings I have left over from treatment with her. And the difficulty I have bringing things up with my new t for fear of getting a dt kind of reaction.
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I'm sorry you had this experience, Blue Moon.