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Like Ihmt, I have guy friends. My best friend is a guy. It doesn't cause issues in my marriage because I have always been upfront with my husband. The two have met and D likes the BFF and his son. I don't share with D all the BFF and I talk about, but it isn't really his business either. The point is, I have always been upfront and not done anything inappropriate with the BFF (not that I want to. Too much like a little brother, ew!)
The difference for you is that she has lied about it the entire time. I don't know if you would be able to get past it, and I don't blame you. While D was honest about his relationship with his bf when we got together (they are no longer friends, totally different story), I knew she pushed the limits of boundries with him. (For instance, she offered him sex while I was pregnant with our first daughter, and we had just found out I was high risk!) I had to get to the point that I was comfortable in the knowledge that he would be coming home to me, not her. If she had been honest in the begining, and if she hadn't done something inappropriate (which she did) I would say get over it. But obviously, she can't be honest or keep herself from doing things that are sexual in nature with him (even if it is over a phone and not in person).
As much as it may hurt, I would say cut your losses. Sorry, it isn't a happy ever after answer, but at least it's honest.
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I am not a medical or mental health professional, nor do I play one on TV, I just talk kinda like one!
 Blessed are the cracked for they let in the light! They say I have A.D.D. but I think they are full off... Oh look! A CHICKEN!
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