thanks all of you for your input in this.

vicki has been our main concern for awhile now as she has been threatening to hurt herself/us. she wanted to go into the hospital so that she could be cared for. our T does not think it is a good idea because T won't be able to work with us and that would be really traumatic because we are just beginning to be able to trust her--esp. vicki.

we did hit a compromise for right now. vicki is getting as much T time as she feels she needs. that meant 3x this week. but it seems to be working. she has calmed down alot and isn't as quick to say she wants to "go away" or "sleep for a long long time". she never felt listened to or taken seriously before. she has much more to say than we thought. she knows alot about the "inside people" as she calls them.

i am being shut out of the conversations--we were co-conscious before. she even gets to drive there and home. it is keeping us safe for right now. it is still really stormy waters and tightrope walking, but so far we aren't in the hospital.
w_i