Hi splitimage,

You may want to tell your treatment team straight up that you don't like the way they refer to self-harm idealizations. Perhaps it is discomfort in discussing these emotions in front of a group (or groups) of people. If you were to discuss your emotions with just one or two members of the team at a time, it might be easier.

Personally, I came straight out and told the director of my team that I could only handle one at a time. I become overwhelmed & pull back when they're all staring at me and asking different q's. I can't even think. My director kindly followed my request. The other doctors stood back quietly as he & I talked about how I was feeling, my care, etc. That really helped me a lot!

Best wishes to you!
Shez