Dear Larakeziah,

My first piece of advice would be to suggest that you take a deep breath and try to calm yourself by remembering that YOU are in control of your treatment.

I think it is a good thing that you told your counselor about the voices. I also think it's a good thing that he recognizes he needs to consult with someone else in order to understand what is going on with you better.

I was taught that sometimes people report having voices when what they are really experiencing are obsessive thoughts, thoughts they can't get out of their head. If that's the case with you, then they would probably not recommend medication. If the voices sound like they are coming from outside of your head, then they are probably "real" auditory hallucinations and there are a variety of medications that might reduce or eliminate the voices. Every medication carries some risks, of course, and has the possibility of causing unwanted side effects, so it would be your decision whether you wanted to try one of these medications.

From the way you describe the voices, it sounds as if they are very harsh and cruel toward you. So I would think you might want to try a medication to try to get rid of them. But it doesn't matter what I think! It's what you think that counts.

As for what's causing them, it could be a number of things. If you have a history of severe or prolonged trauma, then it would not be so surprising that you would occasionally experience auditory hallucinations. You don't describe any other psychotic symptoms -- well, possibly your paranoia -- but in any case it does NOT sound to me like you are going "crazy". My ex-wife had both auditory and visual hallucinations from time to time (as well as depressive and anxiety symptoms), but she was definitely not crazy; she was definitely not schizophrenic.

I can understand your fear and anxiety about divulging this to your counselor. But they are not going to toss you into a psychiatric unit or anything like that! I'd bet my (meager) life savings on that!

I suggest you try to see this as an opportunity to learn more about yourself, to develop more insight into what made you the person you are today and how your different symptoms relate to each other. You may or may not decide to try a medication for the voices. Even if you don't, there are ways your counselor and you can work together to try to get some control over the voices so that they don't cause you as much pain and harm.

I know it's scary but this is also an exciting time for you. Good luck and let us know what happens.

BlueOak