My Support Forums - View Single Post - Stressed out .... fighting the anxiety thing

SUNNY2009 · Oct 24, 2009, 08:13 AM

OK I made it ..... Yay for me.
I went for a walk before going out....that was good cuz I needed a release of stress and anxiety. Got to keep doing my walks or else I get nerved up and cant function.

The night is exactly how I would have wanted it (oth than the partier) but I enjoyed it. We went to my fav restrnt and it was very good... had my fav meal - filet - and had desert - choc cake YUM!
Thanks REG - I took your adv and just focused on the evening! left everything else at home....or on PC

Quote:

Hi Sunny! You can work through this eventually. I had to work through this. What I worked on were healthy boundaries, learning how to recognize and meet my needs, standing up for my self (empowerment/control), working through my stored, unexpressed feelings and learning how to express new ones and improving my self worth. It took some time and the work was gradual. Self understanding is how you get there and then problem solving.

Sannah....thank you...these are things I think I am starting to work on...I am sure T has that in the plans but I am anxious to get there. I want to feel OK with me and I want to know how to do all these things you mentioned....these are my issues and I feel like I am only now (at 40) beginning to understand some stuff ... but I feel like a child who doesnt know this stuff but should.....I think that is where some of my anxiety comes from.
healthy boundaries - last night I realized that this is what is needed with a very needy friend. She has a major drinking issue and also takes xanax. She has many personal issues and well.....I think she is a big trigger for me w/anxiety ...because over the last 2 mos I have kept much distance betwn us....last nite being around her I realized why ..... she stresses me out because she is out of control and can not be counted on....I feel badly but I can not fix her .. She never listens or follows through with my advice and continues to go in circles with all of her issues.....of course I am very understanding butttt....I have so much going on that I just cant handle her.
I think I had been taking care of her to some extent up until recent mos and so I now know distance (boundaries) with her are necessary.

ahhhhh ....that is a good choice for me.

I am learning I guess.

expressing my needs - eeek!
that is one I struggle with. How to ask for what I need.
Or how to just say what I feel at the time to the person and being direct....yikes! thats another one.....
Empoerment / control ....
expressing.... All of these are lost on me, so far but I am working at it. I just wsh I could figure this stuff out quicker but my brain just doesnt work that way.

Anyway....thanks again! I hope you have a great weekend