I truly hate the words never and always, but I feel very comfortable saying that there is NEVER any excuse and/or rationalization for putting your hands on someone else in anger. There were a million things that he could have done to prevent this from happening.

I am truly sorry that you went through this.

Having said that, we all have our breaking point. Something that may seem insignificant to someone else may be a major trigger to yourself. Name calling to antagonize an already irritated/stressed out person just to relieve your own frustration isn't the answer either. It may be a personal issue with me, but in my opinion, bones and bruises heal (not excusing the behavior), but mental and emotional assaults are much harder to fix. I have found that the little, seemly harmless digs doled out over time are the most devestating.

This doesn't sound like a very healthy relationship, each feeding into the other's frustration. It definately sounds like you both need some space to regroup and think things out. It's really hard to teach a child healthy coping skills when they witness these destructive episodes. Even though it sounds like your son is too young to realize what was going on, I firmly believe that infants feel what's going on around them. Tension that adults may miss, children tune right into. Have you ever noticed that when you're having a particularly bad day your child is fussier than usual? You can make an infant sob just by the tone of your voice long before they can understand the words. My grandmother was a twisted woman that made my oldest child just sob by saying "oh what a beautiful baby" but in a sad tone of voice.

I wish you strength, wisdom and courage to make the difficult decisions you face to make life better for yourself and your son.