I truly relate...when my hubby and I were at our worst, we both were convinced that the other wanted someone we couldn't possibly be....after counseling and calm, we found out that we both wanted each other....(just the way we were)....Never underestimate how screwed up things can get when you're under stress...and never underestimate the possibility that he is going through the same sort of fear and frustration about your image of him.....Counseling lets us calm down and, with a neutral moderator, get to the truth....do try if you can......I'll make a bet that he'd do it in a heartbeat rather than lose you.....love G