I think that your relationship is fairly new. A year isn't that long at all. One thing that the two have you have learned is that he has triggers. I really don't think that you calling him a name is a reason for him to chock the life out of you. I do agree that name calling is bad. When the two of you get heated like that it is best to walk away. You cannot solve anything when both of you are blowing up at each other. Walking away gives each of you time to cool off, and think about the situation. Relationships can really go down hill from all of this. I will say that even if you think that you played a part in this or not, doesn't mean he should just forget that it happened. I have been abused. Abuse is a cycle. It will start off small, and get much worse. Lets just say that he doesn't get help. It is very possible that he could start punching you, kicking you, along with the chocking. If his parents are abusive then it is very possible that this has been passed down to him. He needs treatment. The sooner the better.