EA...
Throw out what you believe is logic...
Just my own experience but when dealing with a situation like this, my trying to be logical was actually me trying to rationalize my feelings/actions.

It was very easy for me to overlook that I was finally taking care of myself...
A Foreign Feeling because I was so used to putting others first, no matter what it cost me.
It was very expensive and only battered me more when I did it.
It morphed into understanding that if I was going to feel miserable then I wanted it to be from self-care, not the care of everyone else.
Self care slowly but steadily became more important to me.

Again jme...
Stepping away from a familiar situation gave me feelings of fear/shame/guilt. It didn't matter that the situation was unbearable; it was still familiar...

You are a good and loving person, deserving of respect and courtesy. Demand it with quiet dignity...demand may sound harsh, but it's saying that you will not allow someone to treat you badly, manipulate you, badger you with their woe-is-me accusations.

Hard to do? yes
Worth it? yes

Please keep posting and lean on us for support. Someone will say something that will touch your heart and ease things for you.

In Peace