Hi, Briester! Glad you posted despite the circumstances.
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Originally Posted by Briester
I like computers for what I can do with them and being able to get online but HATE working on them and fixing problems day after day after day.
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You're in IT, yes? Is there any small aspect of working on computers that and fixing problems that you DO find enjoyable? What do you dislike most about the work? (As usual, no need to answer.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Briester
My mind is always telling me that MY life is dreary I'm a failure for not having a job I like and not finishing my degree yet.
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Your mind is telling you these things, but how did these things/values/judgments get into your mind in the first place?
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Originally Posted by Briester
...I'm tired of wearing a mask every day to everyone.
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The emotional strain of wearing such a mask contributed to my breakdown and withdrawal from normal life. May you find a better and effective way to function.
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Originally Posted by Briester
I do my best to offer positive comments here...
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You're succeeding
Quote:
Originally Posted by Briester
...[i] really wish love and compassion for everyone else who's suffering but I can't seem to find that same compassion for myself. I don't even know who I am anymore and can't remember what it was like to be truly happy for more than a few minutes, if that. ... How can I feel such numbness for myself and so much compassion for others?
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These thoughts hit close to home for me. Regarding the lack of self-compassion, I
speculate the demand to place the needs of others before my own is deeply stamped in my unconscious.
I enjoyed your rant. Please rant again sometime.
__________________
My dog
mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.