Bebop,

I had some of the same issues as you earlier when I was alone. It seemed liked I had no one ever I could really talk to after my mother passed away. It's a bit better in that department now that I'm married to a wonderful woman but there are many of my dark thoughts and aspects that I simply cannot or will not burden her with so for the most part I stay silent. My father never really knew what to do and for years insisted that I was "manic depressive" despite my telling him from time to time how low I was feeling and even insisting that I never had "highs" or any of the symptoms associated with the manic phase of bipolar disorder. I diagnosed myself earlier with depression/dysthymia and when I finally did go to the doctor to try to get some help 3 weeks ago, she made the same diagnosis.

Anyway, I'm sorry to go off an my own tangent but just wanted to say I understand the loneliness and sadness and wish there was something I could say or do to make it all better for all of us but the only thing I can do is off a virtual hug and let you and anyone know that if they ever need/want to talk or vent, just PM me.

Take care of yourself and I hope you day gets better.

Chris