Quote:
Originally Posted by Nypheria
no no nvm. I regret asking a serious relationship question here. Im the bad guy, Im crazy, so Im clearly clearly wrong in everything I say, I get it.
i was just asking for some help with my fiancee. He spends the night with his mom 2 or 3 days a week and eats breakfast and dinner with them pretty often and it makes me feel terrible. I dont like them, they insulted me several times, so dont even bother asking him if I can come too.
I dont want to go because I LIVE here and he supposedly does too and he should realize I take care of the home, clean after him, give him love and everything else as well. Not his mom. He isnt a little boy anymore and needs to realize that. He has a family now of his own.
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Nypheria...hi
Don't give up
You are not the bad guy, crazy, or wrong...
I agree that having a calm and honest talk with him may clear the air between the two of you. Perhaps y'all can compromise whereas he sees his mother just once or twice a week and you make plans for yourself to get out of the house and meet with friends.
It's early in your relationship and these things need to be addressed...
He does need to recognize that you should be the center of his attention. He can still give his mother enough attention to ease any guilt he may feel and to deflect any guilt trip his mother may try and lay on him...
There is love between the two of you. Compromise is essential in a healthy relationship...perhaps some counseling would help?
Jmo, but no mother should be making these demands on him when he has a life with you. But he also should stand up for you and honor what you need from him.
Talk...it can make things so much easier...my own experience is not to make accusations, but be truthful;
"When you do this (whatever it is) it makes me feel bad."
Ask him to listen to you completely before he answers, then you do the same thing for him.
It's a start on opening up better communication...
My best wishes,
Catherine