I'm with Berries, Briester. No matter what you think, that baby will always wonder why you did not stay. Kids never stop needing their parents´, and by that I do not mean stepparents. You are not a threat to the lives of your family, so no, I don't think leaving (as in the planet) is what you need to do to feel better. Hugs, dude. It's a hard row to hoe