Zen,
Jmo, but three years is really not that long of a time when it comes to an assault.
My last one was nearly three and a half years ago, but occasionally I will have times of intense fear also. It was such a help to me to attend a free support group, there were also free lessons on self defense. Although I didn't think I needed it because of my military service, I learned a great deal about protecting myself.
It did not give me a false sense of security, but it did help me realize that I could indeed defend myself.

Letting your guard down...again, jmo/jme, but it will never really go down but it will evolve into a more comfortable level...if that makes sense.
Early on it helped me to make sure I was safe at home as far as locks, lighting, etc.. It time I was alert but did not feel helpless.
What ways do you feel you could feel empowered? What made me comfortable may not be what you need, perhaps coming up with your own plan will do it.

In Peace