Hi Kallen,

Many of us here have been brought up by dysfunctional parents of some kind, in one way or another. Here are a couple of my thoughts after briefly scanning your post. The ones that jumped out at me!

First, Don't you think your husband can't tell that there may be something wrong with your family, and do you really think he will be surprised if you would tell him. I would think it really strange just the fact that the '45' year old brother is still living at home!
Also, you stated that you have moved on with your life, and don't want to be caught up in their problems!
You answered your own question there! It looks from my point of view, that you are well on your way to your saying good-bye.
In my unprofessional opinion, I bet too you would feel better by letting your husband know your past life. He is your husband, you should be able to share that with him. Lean on him, and I bet you will be surprised at his response. Perhaps that will be the obstical to overcome the past, and move on with your new life, with your own family!

Prayers in your journey to peace,

SongBird