Kallen,

You have been immersed in this stuff for such a long time. But, you are your own person and deserve and should have a life of your own. Make the kind of life that you want for yourself; don't live in the past anymore. I'm being quite definite about this because I know what it's like.

It is possible to move on, maybe with some help from a therapist or a counsellor. You owe this to yourself.

Good thoughts, M