I'm not sure where this goes but I really need some help and advice! I'm not sure what is wrong with me all I know is that there is something wrong! I feel like I'm losing my mind and I can not go on like this!

I'm gonna write down all the things going on in my life that I have struggled with over the last 17 years. Any help, advice or input would be greatly appreciated!!

For as long as I can remember I have not been able to control my anger, the things that I say or do. I often act innappropriately and can become very childish. My behaviour is very irratic and unpredictable and I can not control it! Sometimes I become very depressed, so much so that i don't even want to get out of bed or even want to be alive!! I feel worthless and feel that there is no point going on!! Then other times I'm over elated and have bags of energy and I don't sleep much or for very often or eat much, I talk incessantly about nothing and can come across very rude, which I'm not really! I interupt people and say innappropriate things and my behaviour is irratic at wild at times. I can engage in some dangerous behaviour, such as dangerous sexual encounters and and drug taking. I get stressed extremely easily, by the slightest things or comments. My mood can change with the click of a a finger. I spend all my money on things I don't need!
I self harm and struggle to deal with CSA. My behaviour has been a problem for my family, especially my poor mother who I know did her best for me and my five brothers but I know she prefers them to me! My behavior has also put strain on my relationship with my friends, and I don't have so many as it is!! Its is becoming increasingly difficult to work as my irratic mood and behaviour is affecting my work and relation with my friends and collegues at work. I feel i'm holding on to my job barely!!!

I really feel that i'm losing control and can not think straight, the slightest things can send me into a rage! I don't take criticism well even constructive criticism. I hear voices that tell me to hurt myself and that i'm worthless and need to be punished, they also make me paranoid and tell me my freinds are talking about me behind my back and laughing at me!

I don't know what to do anymore.

I'm currently being treated with prozac for depression and I'm seeing a clinical psychologist on wednesday. I've been on prozac for about a month but I don't think they are doing much. My life is like a rollercoaster and I just want to get off!!! But I can't!!!

Any help, advice or input would be great! Thank you for taking the time to read I really appreciate it!!! And I hope you are all well!!!

Thanks again!