I don't know if I am reading this wrong but I will try to explain what I meant.

I barley talked about it and started having flash-backs. This indicated to me that this was a new subject you were exploring with your T and it was painful and sensitive.

I feel awful. But at the same time I don't feel like I deserve to still be bothered by it. You've decided that, once and for all, enough is enough and you are sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I've never really had time, even with all my T, to really talk about what happened, but it is so hard. This further indicates that you are daring to get down to something that is painful and significant but being brave enough to deal with it no matter how difficult it is.

I feel like it was a scab that was getting poked at and ripped off. I feel vulnerable and scared. It makes me feel exposed. I hate trusting other people.

I know that I need to deal with this but it is so scary. I just want to hid under my blankets and not have to come out. You did an outstanding job of expressing your intense discomfort but also your unmistakable maturity in dealing with this intense pain of growing beyond that which is keeping you prisoner.

Maybe this is the amazing courage and tenacity that is Googley and those who know you better than I are not surprised at all. So be it.

I do, however, recall a lonely spirit who cried out about what to do with frozen eggs. You've come a long way, Googley.