Hi Sickofme.....and welcome!

I wonder......is it spiritual fatigue? Are you desperately missing something you cannot put your finger on?

I have gone through a very similar time in my life.......after 15 years of therapy and meds and hospital, I hit 30. And the last 6 years have been a bit of a ride.......finding and loving who I am......and accepting loss, embracing change and "growing up".

I also wonder if a good therapist may be able to help you navigate the way......to help yourself......to find yourself......to provide a compass through this wild and confusing terrain......have no fear.......would I sound contrite if I said that this is a good thing? That you wish for more in your life? That you question the status quo? I think you are very brave......keep going......for greatness always follows rebirth......

We would never learn......if we did not question......

Take good care......I look forward to hearing more from you.

May your day move with stillness.......and a quiet smile

Michah