I don't know what is going on. Pretty recently, about this past summer, I started feeling...different. It’s hard to explain. During this time, I came up with some pretty strange ideas, but the scary part is that I believed them. I ended up wandering around the woods, talking to plants. I don't think I even realized that it was something abnormal to do. I thought they could talk to me, so I spent a lot of time outside communicating with them through "telepathy”. I befriended one and fell in love with it. Next thing I knew it, I was going down there some evenings to protect it from the "demons" I knew would come. I would curl up in a ball, and create a "force field" to protect it. I would lie there for a while, and then walk back up to my house again.
This eventually faded away. I came to realize how crazy that was, and was relatively
normal for a while. I lived my life as usual, and I disregarded that for a while. Then, a few months ago, I began to have hallucinations. I have had olfactory hallucinations, auditory hallucinations, tactile hallucinations, and visual hallucinations.
The olfactory hallucinations just come at random times, for a few moments, and then they leave. For example, tonight while I was sitting here at the computer I smelled a very strong waft of mint, when nothing minty was present. As soon as I exhaled it was gone.
The auditory hallucinations have all been voices. An example of one of those was when I was drawing in my room, and I heard my English teacher and my mom calling my name. My mom was sleeping at the time, and of course my teacher was not in my house. Once the voices started taunting me about a quiz I messed up on, and another time they told me to clean up. Sometimes I hear them before I go to sleep at night. The voices are pretty common.
I haven’t had many tactile hallucinations, but the few I have had felt like something brushing up against me.
The visual hallucinations are usually shadow people. One time, when I was on a school trip where we stayed in Washington D.C. overnight, I was lying on my cot, wide awake when I saw a shadow person that somewhat resembled Thomas Jefferson coming towards me. That night was particularly bad. I also saw the ceiling open up and turn into a black hole, which was an uncommon kind of hallucination for me.
Soon after I began having these, I sort of drifted into some weird beliefs again. This time, I thought that the whole universe was a figment of my imagination, or some sort of weird dream that I could just wake up from. Eventually that belief went away.
A while after that I started thinking that people were reading my thoughts using my laptop. This went away eventually too.
Sometimes I get really paranoid. Once, in the middle of the night, I think I heard something like a tap on the floor-it was probably a hallucination-but I thought that it had been made by someone sneaking around my house. It really scared me, and I hid under the covers until I finally fell asleep.
I’m not sure if this has anything to do with the rest of it, but I have also been having blanks in my memory. Usually the blanks are only covering a period of several hours.
Thank you for reading…and if you know what this might be then please comment!