This ship is sinking very quickly.
I have always jokingly said I'm a fruit loop still floating on water.
Try to not let the milk over take youriness - whatever that is

I have been praying that something good will happen and people will understand me...but they don't.
Praying is Always good - Ask and you shall we receive - BUT in his time

My life is in turmoil,
Life is exactly as you say 'there is always some kind of stupid Drama.
BUT - you don't have to accept the Drama.
If it too much walk away - just do it.... You need not to explain anything to anyone (like you said they wouldn't care.. anyway)

Believe me I am NOT being negative with this - I am speaking of my own situations over and over.
How my feelings were always hurt, and I was always lonely, didn't understand why people wouldn't stay around.
I always wanted to fit in, be understood - I actually used to pray for friends.

and people have left me. Even some on here. I am jsut to much for everyone.
BUT, people have their OWN issues that they haven't dealt with nor might not even Know they have them
SO they can't be there for you - They are not there for themselves.

I can't take my any more. It's just to hard to keep trying and trying to get no where.
You haven't found the 'no where' yet, as you need and are trying to find YOU right now.
You can only do your with what you have at the time
Trying and trying puts so much pressure and strain on your brain, emotions even health.

I "try to be me" but no on cares how I feel or my opinions..
You do have your your opinions every body does - BUT that give no one and excuse to force you to go with their opinions.

..idk any thing...I don't know which way to turn...I guess there isn't any way but down....
It sucks the down down down feeling we have so deep inside, as if wer'e at our last step - There are no mor steps down which means THE WAY to TURN --- is only going have to be up.... slowly. One step, one word, one thought, and especially one GIANT pat on the back for each tinee step.

people don't want to talk to me or see me post on here, I guess i should just stop, delete this???? no on cares to read it.
If people don't talk to you - again it's because they are struggling to deal with their issues. And you can see here by what you've wrote how dang difficult that is.

I have begged people to talk to me, help me, be there for me....they say they will be but never are....that's what my life is, just keep messing it up second after second....idk....