Hi, LittleMissSunshine!
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Originally Posted by LittleMissSunshine
i don't cry like i used to. i used to cry to easily and often. but people treat you different when u are too sensitive.
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Over the past decade the idea of "the highly sensitive person" has gained some popularity, and caused some controversy. I cannot know if it applies to you, but you might take a look at this
Wikipedia article (particularly the sources) as a starting point if this type of self-analysis appeals to you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LittleMissSunshine
i'm sick of being treated differently because i suffer from depression. i'm sick of dealing with depression. i'm sick of people changing their opinion of me after they find out or looking down on me for taking medication.
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Here's where I work on a strict need-to-know basis.
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Originally Posted by LittleMissSunshine
what right do i have to complain? there are people who have way bigger things to deal with in their lives... i have a pretty damn good life. ... it's this that stops me from going further. that feeling of unworthiness. that i have no right to feel the pain i do when i have so much to be thankful for.
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Whether you drink from a mug or a teacup, if it breaks, it scalds.
I'm glad you have and can recognize your life is good. Lives are always multifaceted, though, and depression is part of your life. Your pain is real, and pain tolerance is highly individual. An oft-used analogy is that of physical ailments involving chronic pain. Or, would you dismiss the disability of a paraplegic because there are tetraplegics?
Quote:
Originally Posted by LittleMissSunshine
it's that guilt that makes it all a vicious cycle and makes the self loathing grow.
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How true and sad. I've found no escape from this cycle but to ignore it (which is relatively easy to do when you're as scatterbrained as I).
Quote:
Originally Posted by LittleMissSunshine
... and mine is to rely on some one else for love.
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Yearning for love and companionship is nearly universal. May you succeed both in growing comfortable with yourself and accepting your desire to have others in your life.
__________________
My dog
mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.