Mary Alice,
Your comments really hit close to home with me on this one. My hypno-therapist and I were just discussing this yesterday, as a matter of fact, as we were looking into a possible cause for my recent return to serious depression.

My husband is gone for 2 weeks at a time as a truck driver. When he is gone--in fact the moment after he leaves to go back out on the road, I take to my bed for the rest of the day in a state of depression. I feel as if my entire life(I have always felt this way really I guess even when he was not driving truck)is put on hold until he comes home again. I am his wife and in being able to be his wife that somehow defines me and gives me value and purpose in my life.

My girls are all growing up and they do not need me as much as they once did---they are able to do many of the things I once did for them on their own. I honestly miss being their "mommy" even though I am still very much their mother. Being their "mommy" also gave value and defined me as a purpose.

So now with those "purposes" gone so to speak the depression is there again----I feel small and insignificant and almost non-existant because I have nothing to define my value and my worth as a person.

My therapist would like to know who "I" am---I thought I knew the answer to that--guess I don't. For 20+ years the things that I did for them defined me as wife and mother----wife and mother defined me as a human being and gave me value. Now I feel lost---like I said insignificant, without purpose and most of all without value.

Just my own personal musings here. Very thought provoking.

Take care and God bless Deanna