idontknow13 is so right. i have been where u are several times. i feel EXACTLY as u do right now. u could've been writing about me...good days and bad...irritable...no interest in things i used to love...no motivation...no energy...just feel so hopeless and helpless. i understand about the family thing. my being depressed hurts my partner and my children. they often cry for me because they worry so much and i absoultely hate that. i don't wanna bring anyone else down to where i am. give another therapist a try. you've got nothing to lose. it took me quite some time before i finally broke down and sought help and now i feel like i could kick myself for not getting help sooner. u can't do this on your own. i'm glad u decided to tell your mother. i never told my parents myself. didn't want to worry or burden them. a concerned friend went to them after i locked myself in my house for a few days and didn't answer phone or door and now they are very supportive. i am on meds now and go to therapy when i need to and for the most part i have been doing well despite this recent episode. it comes and goes. i'm headed back into therapy now. do yourself a favor and get help. keep searching for a therapist until u find one you're comfortable with. i've been through several therapists and several meds. takes time to find what works for u. don't give up! i'm here if u wanna talk. welcome to PC and congrats on taking steps to help yourself!