hi

i've been through this.

it's hard to leave. it's hard to get the big D (divorce) for failure . . .
it's hard to start over.

a huge red flag here, is his refusal to go to marriage counseling.

in my experience, that shows it's only a matter of time.

whether you have children or NOT, (in your case, there are none, i understand) it is still not healthy to stay in a dead relationship with someone who refuses to try. . . .

just my opinion only

and i do wish you the best
here if you want to talk