Zooropa,
I feel as if I am in the same spot. I really NEED to talk to someone and my T is the only one who really understand me. But I know the struggle of making that decision. I say call her, especially if you have a thoughts of SI or other harming thoughts.
I really hope that you can talk to someone...If you need to PM me anytime and I will be there for you when I am on-line.
Take care,
Hugs,
jen