Last week I had a followup appointment after a miscarriage. I have been depressed ever since I found out I was losing the baby.

I don't want to fire my psych NP, I love her and respect her for taking me on as a client

My obstetrician is acting like a big jerk though. My follow up appt made my depression so bad that I called my NP for support for the first time ever! I almost never call between appts unless I need a med refill or something.

The OB was shocked that my miscarriage hurt so much,she said I wasn't pregnant long enough to have that happen! She said I wasn't taking the Vicodin she gave me, but I was...

Then I got a huge lecture...OB said that my NP told her this was a surprise pregnancy. OB said I should have used more effective birth control! I'm sorry DOC...but every hormonal birth control method I try makes me severely depressed. I didn't go back to her for the IUD because I was embarrassed that I was diagnosed bipolar and I didn't want anyone to know...geez I am HUMAN you know.

Then I got a huge lecture on how she thinks there is no reason to stop Lithium if you are pregnant. That I should take it while trying to conceive and throughout the pregnancy. That the risk of heart defects is low and shouldn't bother me. Then she gave me a bunch of journal articles that I have already read. SORRY DOC! I have held a baby boy in my arms as he died of Ebstein's anomaly. His mom was too sick to be at his bedside, so I stayed with him as he died. (I'm a Neonatal ICU nurse) I held him and told him it was okay to let go... I personally cannot accept any increased risk of this happening to my child. I do not judge anyone who takes Lithium during pregnancy, not at all. This is just my personal view.

She called me unreasonable and got frustrated with me. I heard her and the nurse saying to each other that I wasn't emotional enough....I was trying not to burst out in tears the whole time...

I'm so depressed. Why did she have to get so mean? Would you change docs, or would you try to talk it out with her?