Big big to you, Amazonmom!!! Wow. How can people who go into the caring fields be so insensitive? Lecturing, minimizing, calling you unreasonable, saying what you are or aren't doing in direct opposition to what you know and talking about you within earshot? Or at all! Hello! Confidentiality!... Yikes. That would be an awful experience for anyone, even if they weren't depressed!
You say you love your psych NP. Maybe you could bounce it off her and see what she thinks.
But from what you describe, I think it's perfectly reasonable to look for another. Sounds like the kind of "care" that isn't very caring. Either that or she just totally doesn't *get* a helpful little thing called "bedside manner"(!)