Deli, there's an old military saying directed at soldiers: I can't means I won't. Often it's true. Have you studied DBT? Are you familair with its Acting Opposite to Emotion concept and prescription? No doubt you absolutely don't want to take the test at the most primitive emotional level, but we all do things sometimes that we're very averse to.

Maybe taking the test would mean you're situated to move on and you don't want to, to play an armchair T.