Hi Crying.....I've asked myself the same question the last few weeks. I can't get upset or break everything in sight like I want to........so I cut.
Nothing much helps either to distract me. My T has wanted me to try other things, like going for a walk, etc. I've done it, come back and still cut.
My legs are so badly cut up that pants rub on them and cause lots of pain. I can't wear nightshirts to bed anymore because my legs show. Thank goodness it isn't summer.
I can't say for sure that I wish to stop either. I'm sorry that you are cutting deeper - that isn't good. Do you go to a T? If so, would it help to tell that person? I hate to see you do serious injury to yourself.
Please let me know if there is anything I can do.........I listen well, btw.
Mary Alice