well hello twinnie!!!!

SW, from what you wrote I almost got the idea that yr T had read your email for the first time right before you came in the door (red eyes, yet). We know that they are extensively trained to keep their heads, to stay focused, to be objective, to look behind the words at the motivation, but Ts are people too, and yours was obviously feeling very human at that moment.

I think the odds are great that the two of you will be OK. Also I have a strong feeling that when yr T has had time to process what you gave her, she'll see ia lot more in it than just your actual words, and the two of you will find a LOT to explore. Your therapy may even take a new turn.

(not to say that you did right, or that she wasn't hurt, or even that she did right for that matter - everyone in this tale is a human being.)

I hope this is making sense. I did something similar recently to my own T, and although she kept her cool & assured me repeatedly that she knew it wasn't really about her, still six weeks later she cast some of my own hateful words back into my face, leaving me without a word of defense, feeling very small and miserable. I knew then that I had hurt her indeed, and I am still sick over it. If only I can keep the memory of that misery so that it helps me not to do that again, at least some good will come of it.

here - hugs from a twin....