So, yesterday I told my I told my husband(which is a Dr.) that I was taking my med correctly and working very hard at dealing with this saddness. Well, Mr. Fixit told me to go take a walk and I needed to go to a Phy. Dr. I told him that I can not find one to see me for like 6mos. I will find one for you. So, he made calls and of course I was right it will be Feb. before somebody will see me. He never thinks I know what I am talking about. He called this friend that left one field of med. and went became a PDr. He told my husband that there is a huge shortage and he couldn't see me either. But, he would see me Dec. 1st. that was the soonest he could. He also told my husband that it was my meds. they were messed up. And this is suppose to make me feel better. I have to go 2 more weeks of feeling like this one of which is Thanksgivening (week long vacation to my parents with all 3 kids by myself). Then it isn't like he is going to giive me a magical pill and I will feel like my old self on Dec. 2nd. What do I do? It is so hard "acting happy" when all I want to do is hide in the closet. I am no thinking of killing myself so I can't get help. Well at this rate it is the only thing left that I am not thinking about. Got a lot of social events going on this weekend. My Husband is just thinking that I need to take a deep breath and relax and it will be over before I know it.