How can anyone know or support you if you don't try to reach out to them? I think you should determine who you can trust and rely on most and have a talk with them. If you don't feel comfortable with this, maybe you should try to find a therapist that you can start to tell your story to. Although to me it seems like you are doing a GREAT job! A whole year!! Maybe you just need to have someone there to support you when you are feeling like crap. Hmmm I have one other idea and that would be a group counseling session, then you would make friends and connections and you guys could exchange numbers to keep each other on the right track. I feel like such a hypocrite for trying to give advice when I can't handle my own problems heheh