idk, it's all complicated.
she say's that i don't talk enough. but the thing is. the only reason i was so
open with her when she was just be Best friend was because "duh". she was
my ****ing best friend. now that she's my girlfriend i can't tell her about the
hot volleyball chick that stares at me every time i leave the campus library.
or how i tried cocain for the first time a few days ago. etc.
if i told her about the volleyball chick when she was my best friend she would
have told me to go for it. not something she would likely say as my girlfriend.
if i told her about the coke while she was my best friend she would most likely
have called me an idiot and punched me. but as my girlfriend i don't even know
what she would do. and all of these thoughts run through my head constantly
so when i am with her i seem distracted, because i am distracted. and i love
her and want this to work. but she put me on a pedestal every since i knew
her. and now that we are dating i don't want her to find out that im not
perfect. espeacially since im the guy she decided to lose her virginity to.
****.