Hi, ThePainNeverDies.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThePainNeverDies
I feel like everything that has ever happened to me --- the abuse --- happened for a reason, and I believe that reason is because I deserved it. You know, reading over my journal the other day, I read "I slammed the cupboard door..." That was because The Adoptive Mother had accused me of lying when I wasn't lying, she was the one lying and trying to take me for a fool. But I thought "maybe I WAS a bad kid, maybe I did do everything wrong, maybe everything was and still is my fault".
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This paragraph hits close to home. Somehow, as a child, I "learned" that whatever an adult/authority figure thought was the truth really was the truth. If I thought otherwise, I had to be wrong or mistaken. I have never been able to fully unlearn that "lesson"; my emotions are still closely wedded to it.
Here's hoping our emotions will follow rationality.
__________________
My dog
mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.