Thanks lonegael.

Vickie In Phoenix; I wish you didn't have to feel the same way I do, it's a horrible way to feel and no matter how bad a person's situation is, we all react to them differently. You have every right to feel the way you do.

I am the biggest let down that anyone could ever meet. I let everybody down in life somehow and when I put me first for once because I can't help that one person who ALWAYS needs my help whom I met from another forum, she'll put me on a guilt trip just like The Adoptive Family used to.

You know, I look at the picture of my Foster Parets every day, at least twice and I go to bed with their picture opposite my bed and I wish they were still here. If they'd been here, none of this would've happened. They all tell me I'm pathetic, an attention seeker, a freak, mental and I need to go into a mental hospital and be locked up and never let out again.

Maybe I should go because I'm just like a walking empty shell, but then I'm too scared to go, too scared to admit how much I really am struggling. Nobody ever knows how much I really am struggling. Nobody. I'm too scared to tell them and even writing this now, I'm scared

I odn't even know what to say anymore. I'm stuck. Well and truly stuck.