Hi gorgeous

Even though we have already talked about this together, I still
want to add a little since you are asking for a possible solution.

As you know I used to be terifide of scary movies to the point
that I was to scared to fall asleep and had nightmares.
Since you clearly ask for a solution to something that you do
not realize n therefor cannot find a way of directly dealing with
this, I still think this "mind over matter" approach may help you
out.

Whenever I was watching a movie and tension would build up
to where a scary scene would be coming (usually accompanied
by dramatic sounds and tunes and such) Id start feeling scared like ...
"uh oh, something bad is going to happen" normally I would close my
eyes n wait until the shocking part was over, then carefully open
my eyes again.

But then one time when I was attending this movie marathon with
a bunch of people, it would last all night and obviously lots of different
kind of movies, one of which of course was a scary movie. I was a young
adult and felt I couldn't be closing my eyes and covering my ears in
front of those people anymore.

So as the movie started I already start lightly grinning acting as if I was
actually already gunna enjoy this hella cool movie as others did. Though
inside being very worried about how I was going to deal with this movie.

But, as this movie progressed I noticed other people finding humor in
this movie due to poorly decorated studios or rediculously simple costumes.
And when a scary scene would be coming they would actually laugh
out loud. I found that laughing about these scenes made it very easy
for me to subside those feelings of fear and as the movie progressed,
I found myself laughing really loud about certain scenes (probably
because I was scared to death ... at first) but it did help me to actually
ignore those feelings more and did not have to cover my eyes or ears
anymore.

So I kept this up, as if I was a scary movie fan taking extreme enjoyment
out of scary movies. As I kept laughing about these scary movies
I realized that at some point I actually DID enjoy these movies anymore.
And without even realizing it, I got over my fear of scary movies and to
this day I still enjoy them, hella funny lol. I take it with a grain of salt
anymore.

Now I think since you have trouble recognizing and therefor cant directly
act to get out of this cycle, maybe taking a more practical indirect approach
may help you to get over people criticizing you.

Whenever you feel hurt by someones criticism, and think that
"omg, this is painful", remind yourself of who is actually criticizing you
and is this persons criticism something u should take seriously, let alone
hurt you. When you feel this hurting, just start laughing. Even when you feel
hurt or sad, replace those feelings of pain and sadness with humor.
Just start laughing about it, even if it doesn't make sense and feels
unnatural, it WILL take the severity of this persons criticism away
and instead of falling down into a deep pit of sadness, you WILL be more
resilient to this criticism n will find it much easier to let it go again.

At some point, when keeping up the replacement of pain and sadness
with humor, it will become more and more easy to you and will grow
your resilience to these peoples criticism. those people will think
that their criticism has no effect on you and wont bother anymore
next time. And you will (before you know it) actually not be hurt about
it anymore and take that with a grain of salt too.

Its a matter of recognizing your feelings, replacing them with positive ones,
repetition, repetition and repetition. You will notice that by already
laughing when really feeling sad will take the severity away, even
when laughing itself feels unnatural. But you wont be as hurt anymore
and by keeping this up, at some point will grow easier and easier
until someones criticism really doesn't bother you so much anymore.

Its a practical way of directly dealing with the things you do recognize
such as your feelings as a result, therefor indirectly dealing with the
cause of those feelings, which are peoples criticism and negative opinions.

lol, am I still making sense??
Mind you, its a possible way of dealing with this. That it helped for
me does not mean it will for you. Also, we are not talking about a scary
movie here, though I think the approach may have a similar effect.

But, whenever you feel bad or need approval. I have nothing but loads
of it for you sweetie, so feel free to come to me whenever you need, ok?

I love you so much, you're the best and
you make me so very happy.
Kristian