Gosh you must be so proud of her .

When I came home today I think Tony realised how much I've struggled (I'm in no way saying he hasn't because he's been really scared and poorly). The trouble with anxiety and all the crap that goes with it just doesn't go away when someone else is ill, it heightens things because you have to carry on and i DID carry on and just forgot to take self care. He gave me a massive cuddle and promised we'd be ok, it will just take time, so then I felt secure again and had hope. My T told me to sleep as Tony and I are both exhausted after everything, so I did and I feel better but a bit foggy. I have to learn that not everyone wears their heart on their sleeve like me, Tony is the exact opposite and numbs out. His mother was very controlling and my T HAS EXPLAINED A LOT ABOUT FAMILY DYNAMICS ...oops sorry for the caps ...

anxiety meds I'm afraid ....

So I respect that he wont go to therapy, I have to respect that, his family are all the same, they wont talk to strangers about stuff. I just have to try and work this out in my head if the marriage can work or not .... and talk obviously to him. 23 years is so long, but therapy changes people and maybe it's me who has grown (though it doesn't seem like it right now). We'll see, thank you for listening to me today, it means so much, Ophelia xxx