I am stressed ... things aren't "right".

I was fighting and when I fight with this person it's draining ...awful.

I think about si in general, but now when i'm fighting of course it's a struggle all day even when I'm not fighting.

I don't want to cut...I don't want to see the scars. My legs were so bad from the last time I hate it. I think ok if i have to I'll cut my stomach maybe?

The person talks to me later. ..not fighting..just talking, but now my mind is surging...sorta feel like i'm losing it or I'm not sure what. I'm hyper...In my mind I'm saying random words over and over. Is that a distraction?

I'm in trouble. I know I am. I tell him. He's not sure what I mean. I don't really want to say. I just say talk to me...cuz that helps. Words are popping in my head...such as blah blah blah ..loud. Am i losing it?

I feel like I need to hold on...hold on for what i don't know.

If I cut ..will it even help? I don't even know wtf to do? Now I'm getting worse cuz of what is happening.

Too late ... i got the razor. I go for my stomach, but that doesn't work cuz i don't feel it the way i want to.

I go for my arm, but I don't want it bad b/c I don't want to "see" it. Make sense?

Well it must help a bit .. I guess...but now I'm talking and I'm not making sense. I'm confused and I'm confusing the person I'm talking to.

I need to go. I know I sound crazy, but I don't know...maybe someone else know what i'm talking about...and maybe that will help.

I haven't had to cut..and now i'm in trouble.