If you can, try to think of your ex as a list of qualities. Not as "your ex" but a list of objective qualities. The 'absolute deal breakers', the 'really would be wonderfuls', the 'would prefer but not absolutes', and the 'wow! hubba, hubba wonder if there's anything underneath that exterior'. Once you get your list together, you will have something to work with. (Also, throw in any other category that makes sense to you.)

Then, once you have your list together, it might de-personalize your search a little. You might be able to quit looking for someone *exactly* like your ex and see guys and meet guys who have potential.

My suggestion? Re-explore your own interests and get out among people and you will meet men who have the same interests. It's a starting point.

Oh, and by the way. I remarried at 38. I had two miscarriages (they were surprises because I had suffered severe endometriosis for 20 years) but then I had my first and only son at age 41. He was perfect. He has been the greatest joy in my life.