yes, i remember--i was on heart medication while hospitalized for anorexia and continued to take it for several months after i got out. thanks for your encouragement. it's hard for me to heed warning that i know would be good for me...i'm in this removed state where i almost think my mind's slipping back to where i don't care about what bad things happen to my body. at the time during my heart trouble i remember being terrified. now, i just hurt inside so badly that i don't care how my body is affected (it deserves to be punished) and i know that must sound so vile and evil. does this make any sense or am i cracking up?