Shadow is totally right. In order to recover, you have to think about YOU. Not the people that wronged you in the past. You. What he said is what anyone with as much time sober as he would say to you. It's not to say you're wrong, to demoralize you, or anything of the sort. It's to get you OUT of the problem and IN to the solution. If everything you've done up to now is getting you nowhere, then it's wrong. So the opposite of that is right. If you're not the problem, there is no solution. You can't change what she did, so you can't change the situation and you can't change her. But you can change yourself. You can change the way you look at the situation. And to live in yesterday, you live in the bottle. If you won't change your attitude, you'll have to change your sobriety date. That's the cold hard truth whether we alcoholics want to believe it or not. I have 95 days sober today. I don't have a lot of time. But I'll take someone yelling at me and telling me to get off the pity pot any day, any hour any minute, over my old life of drinking. I hope you'll change your mind about what seems like attacks. They're not. We're just trying to tell you how to stay sober.

Just don't drink today, say that when you wake up every morning. And let go of the resentments.

Hope you find it....

~Rayna