Hi Pimprenelle,

Sometimes it helps to get a fresh mind to share your problems, so here goes!

Reading your post very carefully, I think that you are not getting the support you need, either from your friend, or from the guy you are involved with. This must be very lonely for you.

However, your friend might have a point? I am a guy myself and I know that a classic trick from some guys is to keep women hanging on, and they say that they are 'not ready to commit'. It's a way of keeping a woman available without having to give anything of themselves.

I think you did the right thing by letting him know that you are OK on your own and don't need him to help you.

I'm really sorry you are in this situation, and I hope that you can move on to something better. I believe that when someone really likes you there will be no doubt in your mind, it will be obvious by everything they say and do, that they like you and want you.

There is a guy out there who will buy you flowers, and look after you, and if you hang about with someone who is wrong, you may miss the right guy.

My own daughter dumped a guy, a successful film actor, because she wasn't getting the love. Now she has met a completely different guy, who really shows his love, and she is so much happier (and I am happier for her).

I would say, be strong, believe in yourself, and move on. Also, don't waste too much time sympathising with your friend's problems, think of getting your own life moving again.

Good thoughts, M

PS - I have given quite strong advice because I was once married to a woman who didn't really love me, and it was hell. My present wife loves me, and I am so glad we found each other.