Thanks NuckingFutz... the meltdown rages are the hardest thing for me to talk about. While I wouldn't wish them on anyone, it's good to know I'm not alone. Some are bigger than others, but ain't none of 'em pretty. To so utterly lose control like that, I'm just so horrified by myself. And I've had the hardest time figuring out what will set them off(!) I *think* I've noticed some correlation with times I get hypersensitive (tiny barely perceptible noises annoying the hell out of me, like that). It's like I'll hit this frustration and a white bolt of lightning hits my brain and I just start flailing -- throwing things, pounding things, usually beating the hell out of myself in the process while ranting or screaming.
Yes, lovely that.
Those are the moments when my usually preferred term of "mentally interesting" doesn't quite cover it. Not by a long shot.

It's horrible to experience or witness, but it's the shame that really stays with me. That and having to see the damaged table etc...and be reminded.