Oh my word, you have been through a lot! ((((xflygirl)))) I have to say I admire your coursage to stick around after the first time, and in all the work you did finding him help. In my case, I don't get "pure" manias, but I do get dysphoric mania (depressions with a twist) that can erupt into stuff very much like what you describe. Usually I don't think clearly enough to go for a weapon and the most deadly thing I've taken to was a bowl of potatoes. I can do some amount of reasoning now that I know what is going on and get myself someplace where others are not until it passes, but if I can't, then bad things can happen.
It would be great if you can find a T for yourself as well as for your husband. It is important for you to have support in how to handle these situations and protect yourself. Though honestly, I think you did great, I would hate to see you have to go it alone. HUggs, dear, I hope you keep posting, and welcome to PC. Keep safe!