Hi, Sundance,
I'm certainly not a good one to be giving advice, but I think your body is telling you something significant.
What is that?
This man, your old flame, caused you a lot of distress, PLUS, he placed blame on YOU for his actions of trying to harm himself.
Obviously, you had strong feelings for him at one time, but now you have a significant other, your boyfriend. I am wondering what purpose it will serve to be in the company of this old boyfriend? Just a friendly visit? For some kind of face to face closure? To resurrect old feelings? To bring back all the pain you experienced?
Of course, it could be that now being in his presence, you will realize there are no longer any feelings for him, and that could be beneficial. On the other hand, he sounds very unstable, and you could be setting yourself up for more heartache and anxiety....and I think that is what your body is trying to tell you.
My personal opinion...no worth much, mind you...is that seeing this man is not a good idea.
Seeker